Blog For Free!
Archives
Home
2004 June
2004 May
2004 April
My Links
Integral Institute
Integral Naked
Wildmind
The Hunger Site
My Website (currently offline)
E-mail me
tBlog
My Profile
Send tMail
My tFriends
My Images
Sponsored
Blog
|
| news update from Nanning, Guangxi |
| 05.02.04 (8:53 pm) [edit] |
Sitting at a computer at Crystal's brother's apartment...
Well, it's been a while since I posted... my computer has had problems to say the least. I guess it was a couple fridays ago when I drank a bit (a lot) with some teachers at my school and then went home and passed out WITHOUT turning the computer off as I normally do. Sure enough, there was a thunderstorm that night with bolts of lightning itching to fuck with my computer... and eventually, they succeeded doing so. The next morning my computer would not start up... not a big deal... borrowed another computer from the school, plugged in my hard drive to back up my data before I reinstalled Windows, but guess what? The only folder I needed to access was inaccessible ("Access denied.", it said). I then proceeded to go on a mad search for a solution (before crying like a little girl for several minutes). Anyways, after a week of trials, errors, mishaps, insights and a few more tears I was able to recover my data, my precious precious data (which consisted of all my pictures from the last few months, documents, videos, etc.) It was actually pretty drama-filled... ups, downs and several arounds... a much more interesting story inwardly than it was outwardly, as many things are.
I should go... the smiles and pursuasiveness of a cute little 4 year old girl beside me is hard to pass up...
|
|
|
| |
| Sens get dropped... |
| 04.21.04 (8:01 am) [edit] |
Well I woke up early this morning to catch the Sens Leafs Game 7 (12 hour difference here in China), and was upset to see the Leafs score 3 unanswered goals in the first period alone as they went on to win the game 4-1. So sad. Of course it's just pride in my hometown's hockey team that took a beating so it didn't really hurt that much. Pride isn't important. Well, I guess it did hurt a bit. On the positive, it's one less pre-occupation in my life and it's good practice for dealing with loss (the Sens are making my acceptance of loss stronger and stronger as the years go on).
Go Sens... Go.
|
|
|
| |
| Meditation update... |
| 04.21.04 (7:45 am) [edit] |
Well I said my meditation needed refreshing and I guess being conscious of the fact allowed for it to happen rather naturally and out of coincidence.
I was talking to a friend who was in the hospital recently and started daily meditation as a way to work through her physical problems. When I enquired about the method she used, she told me that she does mindful breathing and metta (lovingkindness). I had heard of metta before but not in much detail so I thought I would do a little research on in on the web. I eventually found two great sites: [url=http://www.fwbo.com]FWBO[/url] and [url=http://www.wildmind.org]Wildmind[/url]. Both of them have straight-forward and well explained 'instructions' on how to meditate and focus mainly on mindfulness and metta.
[i](Side note: I should mention here, as a background, that ever since I read that book by [url=http://www.jkrishnamurti.org]J. Krishnamurti[/url] (The Essential Krishnamurti), I have basically been quetioning the use of thoughts, methods, goals, ideals, etc. for everything in life. It sounds crazy, but his writing is very relavatory and makes you question the validity of just about everything you've come to think of as true. (He tries to make you see things for as they are and live your life based on that.) And of late, my meditation practice has reflected this, as I have been simply 'trying' to stay aware of anything that arose in my awareness and to just watch it without using any method such as following or counting the breath, reciting a mantra, etc. However, I feel that now I am able to take the lessons I learned from Krishnamurti and others - Osho, for example and transcend it (which is to go beyond and include). I am very perceptive to the fact that there is no 'one path' to truth, freedom, one-ness, God, or whatever (one should question the words of anyone who does claim they have THE asnwer). And I know that thoughts, ideals and methods are not inherent in the Kosmos, in Nature, but knowing this allows me to use thoughts, ideals and methods in a conscious manner. One should transcend thought and include it in a wider embrace.)[/i]
Wildmind is a little bit new-agey and is designed primarily for real beginners, but it has so many great nuggets on methods, interpretaions and 'troubleshooting'. So it seems as though I have found a new method for my meditation (while at the same time being aware that it is simply [i]one[/i] of the many possible paths towards a deeper understanding of reality). I start by focusing my awarensess on my feet and then all the up to my head, followed by mindfulness, and followed by metta. Having a method to follow feels much better. My awareness has a nice house to live in now, a structure to rely on. Sweet.
|
|
|
| |
| Thoughts on today's meditation... |
| 04.16.04 (2:39 am) [edit] |
Pretty drifty today (and for the past week for that matter).
I find it very odd how little control we have over our minds. Like, I consciously don't want to drift away to something other than the awareness of my breath and other sensations, yet off we voyage into meager memories or thoughts of the small self. Interesting...
I had kind of an insight the other week... an analogy for meditation (in general). I call it: "Doorman to the Divine". Basically, our awareness is likened to a doorman at a hotel or apartment complex. When someone comes to the door, you smile and let them in. You don't stop and chat as that causes inefficiency in your job. We're just doormen... letting people in with a smile. (Thoughts arise, we acknowledge them, then let them pass). Pretty simple. Unfortunately I'm a pretty chatty doorman, might get fired soon.
Either way, my meditation is in need of refreshment.
|
|
|
| |
| Future of this blog... |
| 04.15.04 (6:16 pm) [edit] |
So I guess this will be the place for random thoughts on life, real, non-dogmatic, evolutionary and involutionary spirituality, travel, links, as well as news on the life and happenings of me. I will keep the [url=http://www.hksar.ca/aha]other site[/url] running for photo galleries and other ideas I may have along the way. Still waiting to get it back up and running.
In a sense this blog is more or less for me... different kind of journal... but more public... no emoticons allowed.
|
|
|
| |
| Tomorrow... |
| 04.15.04 (8:24 am) [edit] |
|
No teaching... got the picnic with the school at 10... then I'm FREE for the rest of the weekend. Lord knows what I'm capable of in the veritable wonderland of Delight here in Zhongshan!
|
|
|
| |
| So this is a blog? |
| 04.15.04 (7:42 am) [edit] |
Well, here's the first post... ever. I feel extra special all of a sudden.
Reading "The Essential Aurobindo" right now... pretty nutty...
OK, this is boring...
|
|
|
| |
|
|
